Hello my friends, it's nice of you to drop by. Did you read all thirty-one days of fun? It was really just meant to last until the end of the year, but I've definitely found myself wanting to chronicle every day of 2013 so far. The truth is that the month of fun changed my life, and I think there is one main lesson that I got from it:
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What's Love Got To Do With It?
I've mentioned some of the challenges that I encountered, when I got carried away with enjoying my life in the last post, but I want to expand on those now. One of the hardest things to deal with is the fact that there are consequences to all action. I think selfishness says "Consequences be damned!" and love says "Will this bring good after this moment, to me and all around?"
The really challenging part is in the fact that selfishness, if by selfishness you mean an awareness of one's own desires, needs and hopes, is necessary. My motivation for implementing a month of fun was that I spent most of my time reviewing my responsibilities, making sure I was doing right by everyone, and wondering why on earth I felt this deep seated fatigue in my existence. I decided to try a month of fun because I didn't really know what it felt like to just enjoy everyday that I was alive. I wanted to truly live, instead of just exist. I'm not the only, or the first person to struggle with that. The alternate side is that there is something really ugly about being selfish in the more common definition - concerned with and actively promoting one's own benefit, even to the detriment of others.
I have seen and been party to situations where the fun philosophy lead to heartache, and in the blog's spirit of full disclosure, I'd like to elaborate on the fun philosophy inside the principle of now, inside the even larger principle of love. I want you all (and myself!) to experience true Joy in this life. In a moment like some of the moments I've experienced in the last two years, I've felt like nothing good was going to happen for me ever again. One response to that, after you've fully understood that that's how you're acting, is to say NO! I deserve to be happy! And you'd be right, you absolutely deserve that. The next step is to determine the extent that you are willing to go to see yourself pleased. I hope I'm not talking in too many circles, but my point is simply this: there is a limit to how much you can be satisfied before you start taking something away from someone else. Consider this quote from an author for Psychology Today, Alain de Botton:
The really challenging part is in the fact that selfishness, if by selfishness you mean an awareness of one's own desires, needs and hopes, is necessary. My motivation for implementing a month of fun was that I spent most of my time reviewing my responsibilities, making sure I was doing right by everyone, and wondering why on earth I felt this deep seated fatigue in my existence. I decided to try a month of fun because I didn't really know what it felt like to just enjoy everyday that I was alive. I wanted to truly live, instead of just exist. I'm not the only, or the first person to struggle with that. The alternate side is that there is something really ugly about being selfish in the more common definition - concerned with and actively promoting one's own benefit, even to the detriment of others.
I have seen and been party to situations where the fun philosophy lead to heartache, and in the blog's spirit of full disclosure, I'd like to elaborate on the fun philosophy inside the principle of now, inside the even larger principle of love. I want you all (and myself!) to experience true Joy in this life. In a moment like some of the moments I've experienced in the last two years, I've felt like nothing good was going to happen for me ever again. One response to that, after you've fully understood that that's how you're acting, is to say NO! I deserve to be happy! And you'd be right, you absolutely deserve that. The next step is to determine the extent that you are willing to go to see yourself pleased. I hope I'm not talking in too many circles, but my point is simply this: there is a limit to how much you can be satisfied before you start taking something away from someone else. Consider this quote from an author for Psychology Today, Alain de Botton:
Isn't that interesting, as a concept? It is saying don't be dismayed when the feelings we have don't always reconcile with the external world because, realistically, if we all did everything that crossed our minds, much chaos would ensue. Now, I understand that restraint is absolutely not a modern and hip philosophy, and I like to think of my blog as an innovative and fresh environment, but I cannot deny the value of restraint. I also cannot deny how much I value the direction that I believe God offers me. Consider the love verses below:A degree of repression is necessary for both the mental health of our species and the adequate functioning of a decently ordered society. We are chaotic chemical propositions. We should feel grateful for, and protected by, the knowledge that our external circumstances are often out of line with what we feel; it is a sign that we are probably on the right course.
4Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud5or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
I can literally only aspire to be this kind of loving all the time, and I can only hope to be loved like this. In a principle of now, I realise that I don't have a guarantee on tomorrow to think about my happiness then. I can't or shouldn't attempt to find joy in the prospect of a well executed plan, but instead should be present in today, in right now. I should understand that I am in this moment, and my environment is looking for and waiting on a response from me, but also that the moments don't last for long, and if I don't act, they happen without me. I should make every effort to enjoy my life, to not wallow in the despair of routine, but revel in the tiny and huge blessings that make up a day. If I don't take the time and make the effort to notice and taste and touch the good in everyday, I may not know that everyday is good. Finally, I have to accept that the ultimate experience of happiness is in the pure experience of love. If my pursuit of happiness encroaches on the experience of this love, I have failed.
Love Is the Greatest
1If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. 3If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it;a but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.
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